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By Nick P.

Working at a grocery store, I see many different types of people come through. One type shows up more frequently than I'd like to admit. It is the young lady who is buying jars of baby food and baby formula and she has a WIC slip with her. The lady needs aid obviously to afford these items. They many times come in in work uniforms from their jobs.

Whenever I see these ladies, I look at their hands discreetly. More often than not, I will not see a wedding ring. It always saddens me when I see this. Some time ago, such a lady came through our line again and you can see the sadness in their eyes when they pass through. She hasn't left my mind much and I've been pondering her situation.

I'm 22 and I'm still virgin and I'm still very single. However, I must say that like many other guys my age that when I think about sexuality, it brings to mind many emotions. One can experience fear, excitement, longing, wonder, and mystery. What is this moment like? Will what we're waiting for be worth it? Maybe even if some of us will ever get married and get to experience this joy with another.

I think to when I was in High School. I'll go on and tell anyone that I'm girl shy. I haven't asked a girl out in a long time. In fact, it's been so long that I can't remember the last time I asked a girl out. It's no surprise that I didn't go to my proms then but I remember hearing about them the Monday afterwards. The question being asked was "What motel did you go to?" and I don't think it referred to a ballroom dancing party.

In our High School, one lady told the story in the High School paper of how she gave herself away on prom night and wound up pregnant. Fortunately, the guy was more noble than many others and he married her. I've seen other couples having to get married because of this. The girl wrote in the paper begging others though to not make the same mistake.

And now I look at this lady in line. I think of her situation. What happened with her? There she is with a guy she thinks the world of. She thinks so much of him that she can reveal herself entirely to him and does so. I think back to what that moment must have been like.

Was it a moment of exhiliaration? Was it a moment of joy? Did she finally feel accepted by a guy? Did she feel like she was having one of her feminine needs met? Did she feel like a complete woman? Did she want the moment to never end? Did she repeat it time and time again?

And now I see her. The guy she thought would never leave has left. She is forsaken and alone. The moment of joy has turned into an eternal sorrow. She is alone in the world. She feels like no one cares. Maybe she even thinks of suicide at times but doesn't do so because she has a little mouth to feed alone.

And what of her parents? Have they rejected her as well? It's quite possible. Has she been such a letdown that they've shunned her from the family? Does she then carry the burden of not having a home she can go to be accepted?

And what of her future? Surely she had dreams! Was she going to college? Maybe she wanted to be on the stage as a singer or actress. Maybe she wanted to travel. Maybe she really wanted to marry the guy she'd been with. Maybe she pictured marital bliss forever.

Now what? Does she think that a guy can never love her? Does she think she's blown it forever more? How is it when she sees a guy who asks her out and she thinks he's a nice guy and maybe one who will treat her right even and has to tell him that the date would have to be arranged around her child? How many times might this have happened and how many times might a guy have walked away and she had to experience rejection again?

I've thought about that a lot. I look into her eyes and I want to talk to her. I want to ask her about her life. I want to know what I can do to help. She has gone from the most intimate of relationships to the loss of relationship. Maybe she just needs to know someone can love. Maybe she just needs to know someone cares.

A professor of mine had us review a poem once and write on it. I have been able to write some myself so I decided to conclude this article I'd put my thoughts in poetry. It doesn't happen often but I do try to go deep.


Her basket full
As she comes to the line.
The little slip of paper.
She needs help to pay.
Baby formula and baby food go onto the belt.
Children are meant to be a gift.
Children are meant to be a blessing.
Why doesn't she feel gifted?
Why doesn't she feel blessed?
She looks back in time.
The feeling that was so joyous.
The moment of ecstacy.
A guy loving her so she thought.
She felt no shame at all.
He wanted her.
She wanted him.
It all seemed so wonderful.
How can it be wrong
When it feels so right?
But now he has fled.
His commitment is gone.
Another girl has become his victim.
Oh true, she gave in willingly.
But she didn't realize she was becoming a willing victim.
I look at her then.
Young girl.
What went wrong?
Do you truly desire to turn back the clock?
There is hope for you.
There is one who loves you
And never rejects you.
There is one who cares for you
And desires to comfort you.
A guy might have loved you for your body
But he loves you for your soul.
He isn't fooled by any outward show.
He knows your inner thoughts.
You have no need to fight alone
And you certainly shouldn't.
It's hard enough to fight for yourself
But you have a child to fight for as well.
Perchance you do want to drop this battle
But you just need help.
If you would listen
I would tell you of one who can help.
I would tell you of your hope.
I would tell you of the one who could take your mistakes
And make victories out of them.
But off you go
And though you may think no one has noticed you
You have remained in my mind.
Would I recognize you if I saw you again?
Probably not.
But I will remember your soul.
I remember it at night
And you show up in my prayers.
Someone cares.
That's all I can say.
Someone cares.

Maybe you've ran into this girl in your travels also. Next time you see her, think of what she's going through. Think of how she feels forsaken. Help if you can and pray if you can't.

You know she needs it.

Email the author at ApologiaNick@yahoo.com