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By Nick P.


I don't know about you but I love a mystery. I was always an avid reader and before I got deep into apologetics, theology, and philosophy, I liked to read mystery books. I always checked out every Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys mystery book at the library when they came out. I would still read a new one today. I also thoroughly enjoy the work of Mary Higgins Clark.


There are so many mysteries today. I enjoy watching Monk with my own family today. There's just something fascinating about seeing how he solves the cases. In our own world we have many mysteries such as how we explain things like the Bermuda Triangle or Stonehenge.


But tonight, I have been pondering another mystery. It has been said that Freud went to his grave trying to answer one question. Who could understand women? Have I been trying to figure out women? No. I have been thinking about how guys my age relate in a Christian world and thinking up insights on a deeper level.


Maybe there are some guys like me out there who have always had a hard time when preachers preach on lust. Is it because we're ravenous beasts that are consumed with desire? No. It's because some of us like to live such godly lives that we think in extremes. I thought on this tonight and realized in my own way I had followed this line of thought and punished myself for being a guy.


What do I mean? I mean that we are often told that we are not to have desire in many ways. You can look but that's all it should be! Just look! Don't stare! I must disagree with this on some thought. While there are ways to disrespect women we should admire their beauty and every guy wonders about many things in this area.


I think about this discussing this kind of thing when my own friends and I get together and discuss ladies. I will assure you that most guys I know, including myself, do wonder when we see a beautiful lady, "what lies beneath", and we wonder what it will be like on our honeymoon. What will this experience be like we are waiting for?


So what does this have to do with anything? Mystery. I fear sometimes we have taken the element of mystery from young people our age in this area at least. We are told to not wonder on the mystery. But it is only when something has mystery and wonder that it has any appeal.


I asked one of my co-workers about this tonight after thinking about this. I just asked "Would you be interested in a girl with no mystery?" Sadly, he got called away and we didn't get to discuss it much. I think his answer seemed like he wouldn't though. It had been my own conclusion.


Why should he want someone with no mystery? This is what pornography is even. A girl removing all mystery. (I say girl and not lady for purposeful reasons.) What is there to wonder about first impressions when the first impression reveals all? There is no longer any mystery except for the ravenous mystery. Now that wonder is good in and of itself but the false fueling and using a person as an object is what makes it a problem.


Now naturally, some of that temptaton remains with most women met. One does wonder what it will be like but there is a difference. One who truly respects a lady will get to know her to see if this is the woman he wants to share this mystery with. However, I am aware that Satan will use extremes here to get us thinking otherwise. Wondering about the mystery is normal but it is the lie of Satan to start saying "Now you could find out about this mystery if you just arranged to meet her at her house alone......"


Now I know most guys out there that are single like I am at times mentally plan every step of our honeymoon. Maybe someone is thinking about this now like that and saying "Well after that time won't all the mystery be over?" I will certainly say that it will not.


This is one event that Paul himself described as a mystery in Ephesians 5. What is he talking about? Surely Paul knew the "facts of life." What is he speaking of? Could it be that he was thinking the unity of the husband and wife would mirror the unity of Christ and the church?


In our relationship with Christ, we are ever going deeper into love with him. We are getting to know more and more about the same person. This is the mystery of marriage! In the same way a man and a woman spend up learning more and more about each other forever. The mystery never gets old. It's always new!


But for the person who has cheapened the mystery and hasn't come to repentance yet, imagine what it will be like if they view a woman as just an object? They won't care about the mystery of getting to know each other more and more. The simple man will just enjoy the mystery of the forbidden fruit.


This is why people addicted to porn have tried to block God out many times and people with promiscuity have tried to avoid God. It's not just that God provides a moral standard but God provides wonder to the universe. There will always be mystery but to the person who denies God, they don't need to think about deeper mysteries such as learning more and more about one woman but simple animal mysteries.


Where will they go? The other side of the fence. A friend of mine once told me that if the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, it might be because you're not properly tending the grass on your side. Tend the grass on your side. Enjoy the mystery of the person to and if you're single, enjoy the mystery of what will be.


And don't think this just applies to relations between men and women. I think this applies to our view of God and Scripture as well. If we view any of these as familiar and simple, we will take the mystery. Would anyone enjoy serving a God that they fully understood? I wouldn't. God needs to have an element of mystery to him.


This is one reason I love the Trinity so much. The Trinity gives that element of mystery. Sometimes we try to think of analogies to explain the Trinity but I haven't heard an adequate one yet. I'm also thankful that Scripture didn't give one or else we would lose some of the mystery.


Just try to think of what it means to say that there is one God eternally existing in three seperate and distinct persons. Picture what implications that has for reality. They are really staggering. So staggering that Francis Schaeffer says that if there is no Trinity then he might as well be an agnostic because reality would make no sense. I agree with him.


Consider also that Jesus didn't tell us when the Second Coming would be. I don't know about you but I'm thankful that he wasn't revealed that. (I am of the belief that the pre-resurrection Christ only knew that which was essential to his mission.) Have you ever thought about what would happen if he had told us a date? There are two extremes we could have responded on. Neither are good and I'll leave that to you to ponder it.


Have you ever even wondered why each of the writers of the Bible didn't include a commentary on what they wrote? We would never really look deeper if they had. We'd just say "Ah. This is what they meant." That'd be the end of it. Humorously, I am reminded of G.K. Chesterton's saying on Revelation where he said "While John saw many wild and strange beasts in Revelation, he never saw a creature so wild as one of his commentators."


Friends. I don't know about you but I need mystery. Would you read a mystery if you knew the answers beforehand? Probably not. You need something to surprise you. Something you can wonder about. While that can be found in your spouse, it can best be found in God. Alone God is big enough to give mystery for all time.


In fact,  that's why we'll live forever. We'll live forever figuring out his mystery and we still won't fully figure it out. But then again, I suppose if we ever did it wouldn't be Heaven. Thus, thank God that he is too big for me to figure out or understand.


In Christ,


Email the author at Apologianick@wmconnect.com